I think this is goodbye.
My left ear has been ringing and clicking for a couple of weeks now, the way your ears sometimes do after you leave a show, right? Only this was almost all the time, and only on the left side.
So tonight, after I got home from work, I got cleaned up a little before X and I went out to dinner. After I washed my face, I used a q-tip to clean my ears. Right ear? Clean as a whistle.
But when I pulled the q-tip out of my left ear, do you know what came out with it? Well? Do you?!
A fucking spider. A small one, dead and apparently long shriveled.
In other words, for the last two weeks, I have had a goddamn spider in my head biting away and laying eggs. It apparently got so tired of biting my eardrum and laying eggs that it died. My goddamn brain is full of spider. Fucking. Eggs. When they hatch, they will eat little holes all throughout my brain and then I will be dead.
X was not sympathetic to the resulting hysteria. "Oh," he said, "you're so cute when you're full of spider eggs."
